Rasa

It's not good. It's sending my gastric juices somersaulting right up into my oesophagus.
Before raya, Darthvader buat hal..i cried so much..first for gaza, then re. DV..then the MH17 incident happened. At one point i didn't know what i was actually crying for. Spoke to Him...the boss (at work) intervened and later ObiWan (coSV) consoled. So all was well by Raya.

Two weeks after raya, a friend called. Cat at her office was found to have become emaciated. Asked help to bring it to the vet. Found her a forever (hopefully) home with our in-house psycho-trist.

Two nights ago, heard kitten mewing from the playground from midnight till morning. Had a restless night..couldn't wait till morning so that i could go look for the kitten. Found not one but two kitties underneath a car parked near the playground. As big as my fist - roughly around 1 month old. Both huddled..the nights have been cooler these past few days. Fished kitties out..brought them home and fed them with wet cat food. Apparently belonged to a neighbour 5 doors down. The said neighbour is away on vacation. No bibiks were instructed to look after her cats - many, i was made to believe. Apparently tinggalkan banyak makanan dlm sangkar with water kat porch..tak tahu masih ada lagi ke tak...tak sampai hati nak pi check. Asked my maid to go check and assist as necessary. Hati terasa sakit sangat...sampai hati tuan buat camtu. The two little kitties escaped from the sangkar because jaring2nya lebar. They could have been penyek-ed by a car since they had to cross the road over to the playground. Imagine kittens only as big as your fist. Or mauled to death by stray dogs....apa2 pun malam tu walaupun tak hujan tapi dingin.

Found out that the tamil speaking cat that i took to the vet on his tuan behalf got killed in an accident. Died in UPM vet hospital after 2 days. Three weeks after our encounter. I thought he was the sweetest, most manja cat ever.

On the way to work today, for the third time bertembung dengan van jenazah..all white and shiny..about ten or more, enroute to KLIA. Raptai to sambut ketibaan para mangsa MH17.....tetap keluar air mata walau dah kali ketiga..

Ada staff ni i selalu tegur pasal melayari internet masa time kerja...(err..ok la..i'm guilty of that too but buatla sorok2 jgn bagi clients nampak or..i nampak!). And yesterday, he just collapsed and died...youngish, slim je..anak satu, toddler lagi. All i could think of...i tak sempat mintak maaf kat dia pasal salu tegur and report kat boss dia. (I also mentioned to siapa lagi kalau bukan kawan sehatijanam i yg we should go mintak maap kat SerapMuslim. Ternyata beliau berbahagia disamping kedua2 isteri yg jugak nampak bahagia laga2 pipi and anak jadi cam anak patung between the both of them).

Last week dapat balik simptoms pening, loya, pedih ulu hati..lepas makan muntah keluar balik. Gastric is back...stress tak tentu hala. I feel too much.  And i don't want to feel..takes the 'energy' out of oneself. Ada sesapa tau doa untuk 'mengeringkan' hati?

Whatever it is, don't forget to kibarkan jalur gemilang...bendera and batang mop boleh beli kat Mydin..or any bookshop for eg Pustaka Rawang (the flag, not the batang mop). As a nation, we need it, it's time to heal.


* Melepaskan batok di tangga...most of us know what this peribahasa means..but bak mai i nak bagitau what 'batok' here actually is..It's not batuk uhuk uhuk i.e. not that thing to do with your tekak or lungs but it's actually the tempurung yg dikat pada batang pemegang yg orang melayu dulu2 letak kat luar rumah. Untuk kita basuh kaki sebelum masuk rumah. That is batok. So, lepas basuh kaki pi main campak je. Apparently from Melayu bertulisan jawi to rumi it sort of got lost in translation. There you go! (I excitedly told my mum about my discovery..makcik also got excited. I asked her last time when she was a guru bahasa, takkan dia tak tau?? She said all this while they really thought batuk is batuk uhuk..

**Supposed to be a poignant post..cemana boleh jadi macam ada unsur lawak pulak??