Study sana study sini

I have been quite busy these past few days trying to crack open the mystery of statistics (psssttt..sesapa yg terror buat stats out there dan ingin menambahkan pendapatan, saya rela membayar..). Dah la stats pun cukup makan, guna SPSS pun terkial2..sib baik boleh googlegigli tak yah dah nak pi menapak ke library cari buku stats. But seriously, my offer above still stands, i'll pay by the hour.

Anyway, i didn't reply to any of the comments in my previous entry regarding belajar/study/melanjutkan pelajaran luar negara or dalam negara because i think it deserves an entry.

When i did my A-Levels in the UK, nak kata syok sangat pun idak jugak. I was wishing i was back at PPPITM like most of my friends..dapat naik minibas pi kompleksPKNS, hang out kat taman tasik and main2 mata. Sepatutnya time lepas sekolah should be fun like that but as for me, the fun came in a bit later. The first year was spent adjusting with the new environment. I was put at this boarding house (cam asrama) with 20 other girls. The house was a big georgian cottage by the roadside (I just discovered on the internet that it no longer belonged to the school but it's a posh B&B now) and a big garden in the backyard. During my first year, the houseparent put me in a room with this english girl who i later found out that no one else sanggup beroomate dgn dia pasal perangai cam cucu Afrit. Dia tak la pi merompak, membunuh etc. but she was rude, temperamental and was really a roomate from hell. Bila orang study (ada prep malam, tapi study dlm bilik je. Kalau tak study tapi nak tulis surat cinta pun takpe but tak leh buat bising kacau orang) dia akan keluar masuk bilik. Dah la pintu kat sana tu semua jenis heavy fire door punya jenis and kalau tak itahan akan berdentum. And she'd do that 4,5 kali at least until it was time for supper/snack at 9.30pm. I'd go to bed around 11pm like that, masa tu dia takde kat bilik because pi bersosial kat bilik2 lain. Then bila orang dah tutup lampu cuma tinggalkan her study light on, masa tu la dia nak pi mandi la, nak dengar radio la, pasang lampu besar2 la. She left the house after spring term (because dia tak syok dgn house rules) masa tu baru i realise dunia ni indah sebenarnya....

In terms of classes, teachers etc., well..the teachers were very nice...they seemed genuinely concerned about the students. Probably because in one class students paling ramai pun ada 10 orang..i remember my chemistry teacher who willingly saw me after school to discuss about some chem problems with me or my bio teacher who without fail would send my parents letters after every semester exams to inform them of my progress. Classmates wise, during the first year memang awkward..i was very shy (still am!!), so bila dok kat lab or class memang takde partner. Lagi satu anak2 mat saleh yg masuk public school ni, majority tak pandai sangat, setakat mengabihkan duit parents depa je. Dalam class kalau cikgu takde, asik nak bersembang je. I didn't get what they are saying most of the times so susah sikit nak sembang2 ramai2 unless they talk to me on one to one basis - yes they do that when they wanted to borrow my homework to copy...bt things did get better in my second year a-levels. Agak2nya budak2 mat saleh tu pun sussed out that i wasn't that weird..(nerdy yes).

When i started uni, things were slightly different. For a start, in my year, yg kulit putih and kulit ceklat or hitam 50/50. Of course lecturers pun macam2 jenis. To anonymous who mentioned that her prof snubbed her and not her friend..could it be more because of you pompuan and dia pompuan? Maybe a little bit because kaler you brown? I once had this lecturer yg soooo tak best..i'm describing her quite mildly here. She always commented unfavourably of my work. Katakanlah kalau in one session tu everything went well for me, dia pernah cakap kat i, 'i think it's because you have a supporting partner' (we work in pairs). I had her on Wednesdays..it scared the pants off me that come Monday, i mesti dah tak lena tidur and had persistent butterflies in the tummy feeling. It went on like that for a year. The next year i had someone else for that class and fuhh rasa lega..surpisingly, that woman viva-ed me in my final exam. I was the last candidate for that day and after my turn, she actually came out from the exam room to congratulate me and said that i did very well. I don't know..perhaps she was hard on me before because she could see my potential ke? And being me, kalau cikgu garang2 ni, lagi la i gabra.

Another lecturer (also a lady) pernah tegur macam semua benda i buat salah. kenkadang tu for things like, don't put on perfume when you are in my session because i'm allergic to strong smell, or, take off your bracelet before you start (sekolah i tu memang gila! Jangankan bracelet or ring, nail polish pun tak leh pakai!), next time don't wear big earrings...for crying out loud! She did look like she's been dragged through the bush backwards so janganlah jaki orang nak bergaya, kan??? And you know what, after my convocation, we had tea in this ballroom. And this lecturer actually seeked me out to congratulate me (she said so herself, she told me, Cik Kiah, i've been wanting to speak to you since just now but you kept disappearing (ye la..melarikan diri dari dia). She asked me what would i like to specialise in..mmm..mana ke ada orang fikir lagi at that stagekan..dapat lepas peksa and grad pun dah alhamdullillah. But mulut yg telah ditrain utk menjilat sana sini (utk hidup Esah and not what you're thinking) pantas je menjawab..err...i want to work on children like you. Kah kah kah...dia pun bagi la pointers. Which uni to go to futher studies, who to go and see etc. Well folks, here i am after 13 years, doing what she's doing...So, berbalik kepada my prejudice towards my lecturers ni...i'm sure now that they had my best interests at heart but gaya tak kena..and to tell you the truth i was not that good a student. Kalau subjects yg i suka i score...kalau yg tak suka diatmbahkan lagi dgn element cikgu garang cam mak mertua kassim selamat, babai la subject tu.

Time buat masters was fun...the people were nicer (but stress workload lebih) and they really treated us macam matured students..with dignity. Takde la nak marah2, boleh sembang2 macam kawna. Although, sekali lagi nak ditekankan, oleh kerana i ni pemalu, i taklah bersembang2 sangat dgn lecturers i, selalu dengar je. They thought i should speak up more in class (yg cuma ada 6 org je tu)..tapi masalahnya kita ni org mesia yg bukan budak KBSMKBSR, kita ni pemalu sangat..taku kalau apa kita cakap salah and org gelakkan. Tak pernah la i encountered any racism baik masa undergrad or postgrad..semua equal opportunities..if you deserve it, you get it. Tapi...ada la sorang lecturer jantan ni yg agak tua jugak tapi saja nak cari pasal dgn i. The thing is, he taught radiology...i decided not to take his class as extra subject because undergrad i dah belajar and since i graduated from the UK, i could sign for xray forms (ni regulation NHS). Postgrads from overseas yg lain yg bukan first degree UK kena la ambik class dia. One fine day, he came to see my postgrad tutor (ni diceritakan oleh my classmate who happened to be in the office with the tutor). The Xray guy asked my tutor apsal ada student nama Cik Kiah ni tak ambik kelas dia? Tau tak kelas dia wajib bagi semua students dari overseas. So my tutor ni pun cakap la, well, Cik Kiah ni grad UK tau tak? Then that guy cakap, ooo...you can't tell by their names yeah? Then he left the office. My friend cakap, our tutor called him, racist git.

But you know this Xray guy..i thought the drama ends there but noooooo..masih tak puas hati lagi. One day masa clinic, it was soo busy and my supervisor asik ke sana sini. There was a long queue of students nak mintak signature for xrays. The students can make the decision when to take xrays, we just need signature supervisor saja for thos eyg tak bleh sign borang. So instead of having to wait long for the boss, they made me do it for them. Lepas 20 minit, datang la pakcik xray ni ke klinik we all and terus jumpa our supervisor. Then our SV bawak dia masuk ke bilik kosong kat situ and we all dengar suara bising2 macam org gaduh, then pakcik xray tu stomped off. Rope2nya, dia pi jumpa SV kitarorg and kononnya komplen apasal Cik Kiah ni pi sign semua borang xray kengkawannya? MY SV said, because she could! Ewah2! Dia ingat degree i degree kopi O ke? From A-levels until Masters aku belajar kat UK nak keriau2 ke? Dia tu yg rope macam baru keluar Auswitczh je..(yeah, he was that old and yes, he was a Jew. Not that i have anything against Jews but he certainly had something against me..is it my tudung ke??)

That is why the lecturers i had during my masters will always be my favourite. Sampai sekarang pun we still maintain the relationship. I got them over as speakers for the conference i organised a few years back. Sanggup datang walaupun awal2 i cakap yg kitaorg larat bayar ticket katebang economy class je. Dok hotel pun bilik biasa only. At other times when i email them with questions, they will reply (ni SV phd seniri pun tak nah balas email ceh!).

So, ada yg best dan ada yg tak best belajar kat obersea ni. I was damn lucky that i had more good than bad experiences.