Penyakit keturunan

I come from a pretty laidback family. Takde menatang protocol. I dari kecik dah terbiasa tgk pak I bersiap nak pi kerja buh bedak talkum kat ketiaknya...and he'd be in just his white crocodile spenda. My sis and I bila kena lipat baju, each of us would either have spenda pak I kat atas kapla macam topi chef atau pakai bra mak I kat luar baju cam Mad0nna. When Little D was three, dia sarungkan pantynya atas kepala and thought she was cool. Whenever the maid lipat baju, BabyX would be mesmerised by my bra. Hm...ke mana tumpahnya kuah kan...

Mak ngan pak I suka cakap2 double meaning...masa kecik2 ye lah I tak faham. Bila dah besar, I cringe OK! Masa mak I first time melawat I kat UK, she had just retired. She was 50..masa tu I ingat 50 cam dah tua sangat. We went to Boots. She asked me, carikan mak KY jelly...dah tua2 ni sore lah! Aiyoo! U can imagine muka gobsmack I..Eii mak ni! I cakap. Ish kamu ni, takkan tak tau kut, katanya. I pointed to her mana rack benda alah tu and cecepat menghilangkan diri. Couldn't believe my ears...
When my siblings had left for uni/asrama, I was the only one left at home. I had to 'endure' depa bercakap kotor double meaning over lunch and dinner..geli geleman I, uols! But at the same time I had to keep a straight face. Sampai laa ni mak I ingat bebanyak anak dia, I yg paling innocent..hihihiii.

A lot of the things yg depa cakap memang I tak faham..some of it I deciphered like 20 years later bila dah besar panjang. Like one time when I was minding my own business in the toilet. Suddenly it hit me that the lebam2 on my mum's body were not just any 'hantu' yg gigit but a certain hantu. Nak terjatuh I dari toilet seat! Hish depa ni tau! Laa ni I terpikir fuiyoo...don't play2! Adventurous sungguh hantu tu. Belakang lutut, peha semua ada. Leher toksah cakaplah kan (and I'm still cringing as I write this). Yes, I do speak loklak sometimes but believe me when I say among kitaorg ie parents and siblings included, I yg paling square..can you imagine depa yg lain cemana..termasuk sekali my desperate hoswipe cousins. So, I can safely say my kids take after my side of the family...kalau harapkan MG, mak dia pakai apa masa tido pun dia tak tau (ni I tanya dia pasai once I nak belikan mak dia baju kelawar and tak sure mak dia pakai ke tak).
So my kids and their fascination with shirap, shatan, buat love, the f and the z, I would say, bring it on!

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