Jessica, Ralph and Robbie

Ada fan Cik Kiah cakap blog ni cam di celah2 kehidupan. If sesapa tak tau DCCK tu adalah ruangan dlm MM hari Ahad yg menjadi santapan ruji CK, amma, akak, auntie, cousin dan memana pompuan yg CK kenal lah. And of course the guys i know would avoid it like a plague. I must say that dlm blog ni i banyak merapu je, the stories are nowhere interesting or as colourful as the popular column. Apa2 pun timaksih la FKK oi..

There's one story ni dah lama i nak mengomel. It's about anak someone ni and i shall name her JessicaBiel. She is in the late teens, cantik, tinggi lampai putih melepak. Kalo i budak laki dgn hormone tengah jongkang jongket mesti si Jessica ni i igau2kan sampai tak tido malam. Bila dah ramai peminat, amma and appa cam risau, taknak anak dicop playgirl. Tapi bak kata Esah yg kononnya i ni dasar bohsia jadi2an, i cakap kat Jessica, now is the time to enjoy. Have a lot of friends, don't be serious on one guy je. I supposed, yes, kita boleh keluar dgn ramai lelaki tapi naluri manusia ni yg cenderung berlap2 ni, mesti le berlap2 ngan sorang je kan? Melainkanlah kalau set2 siamang jadian kan?

Bebanyak jantan yg usha si Jessica ni, dia boleh terpikat kat sorang mamat yg masih tak lepaih SPM lagi masa tu (minah ni dah masuk college). I pikir, apa le yg minah ni tengok kat adik hingusan ni, and i shall name him RalphMacchio..(then i saw her facebook pics with this guy. Fuyooo, i yg dah jadi mak budak ni pun teruja tengok kejambuan muka dan six pack mamat tu). Anyway, at the same time, bila kat collage, si JessicaBiel ni ada la pulak teman tapi mesra dia. This guy whom i shall call RobbieWilliams. Bila tanya you all ada apa2 ke? Eh takde..kawan je ni. So isaid to Jessica, takde jantan yg akan sanggup ikut pompuan kehulu kehilir tanpa mengharapkan sesuatu..melainkan jantan tu nyah la kan..

Bila dah nak dekat SPM, si RalphMacchio pun tak le berhubungan sangat ngan Jessica ni. Dia sibuk nak peksa, ditambah pulak rumah masing2 jauhnya dekat 20km plus mamat tu masih kat sekolah lagi so selalu pokai. Duit belanja 3 inggit sehari je cukup2 utk beli kopok lekor. Si minah pun boleh ugut2 kmat boiprennya, kalau you tak tumpukan masa kat i, you tak sayang i la tu..kita breakup!

I said what???! You pi dump dia masa dia dah nak SPM? Tsk tsk tsk! Kata si Jessica, a ah..mamat tu merayu kat dia satu minggu supaya tak ditinggalkan but minah ni jual mahal. At the same time, si RobbieWilliams lak menunjukkan belang sebenar. Jessica! ko tinggalkan budak ingusan tu. Kalau you nak kawan ngan i, kawan ngan i je tau! So Jessica pun cam bangga la..satu pergi, satu lagi dah standby. Sian si RalphMacchio..but this guy earned my respect. Dia menangis cam KassimSelamat seminggu je, pas tu dah tak berbunyi apa2 dah. He sat for his SPM and bila si Jessica ni terhegeh2 kat dia, dia cakap Podah kau!

I tanya amma JessicaBiel..apa masalah minah tu ngan RalphMacchio? Dia cakap RM tu cam tak perlu sangat kat minah tu: he has his studies, his friends and family. So takdele 24jam nak laling laling kat pesbuk or SMS. Whereas si RobbieWilliams lak comes from a broken family..mak dia jauh..adik2 beradik tak rapat and appa tak dengar cerita. Therefore, mamat ni kalau boleh nak melekapppppppp je. So i guess, JessicaBiel cam flattered le that she's needed 24 hours..

Hehehe..i gelak je. Baru2 ni amma Jessica ada bagitau i yg minah tu dah naik lemas pasal RW asik control segala lagak cam laki kap lam. Pergi college, balik college, tak leh merayau mana2, no lepak2 with friends, no sms dari jantan memana and obviously pesbuk friends discreen dulu.

Itu le cakap CK awal2 tak nak dengar si amma Jessica ni. Zaman college, uni la nak berfoya2. Awat la awal2 lagi kaki tangan semua dah kena pasung?

Of course la akan i selitkan alkisah i dolu2 kan? Masa i baru masuk 1st year at uni, adalah sorang jan ni. Rupa boleh tahan, IQ pun ok kut. one of those that could have been but sebab yg buat i put off sesangat tu was he was quite a conrol freak. Sometimes he made me repeat my questions to him in a nicer way baru dia nak jawab. Ewah! Apa dia ingat dia PrinceWilliam ke? Podah!

And then, masa zaman i gersang sosial life (takde keluar dgn mana2 jantan), my sis introduced me to her adik angkat. Intro thru tefon. She gave him my house, office numbers (sib baik takde hp masa tu) and also my email. Let's say we became friends on wed, by Fri dia bukan setakat tefon i kat office, dia hantar email lagi and bila i balik rumah, tak panas vontot lagi dia dah call.Nanti kang malam call lagi. tak tau apa nak cerita dah. so i asked my sis to tell him, man man la. Adik i ni jenis yg tak suka orang over2. You know what? He flipped! He said to my sis, orang concern pasal dia pun dia tak faham. Concern is one thing, gila is another.

Tuhan tu maha adil kan. Ha ambik kau katanya. I dapat MG yg sikit no hal punya what i get up to. Once i had to attend a dinner, so i informed him i have to be back late. He said, OK. I pulak yg nak kena cakap, don't you want to know where i am and whom i'm with? Baru dia cakap, oo..Ok. Camni punya laki pun ada.